Lucia Lien

My marriage of twelve years broke down as I could not cope with living with my husband who had a very broken childhood.  To preserve my own sanity and to protect my son’s well being, I left my matrimonial home in Belgium.  In Jan 2003, I came back to live in Singapore.  I was looking forward to re-building my life with my son who was seven years old then.

In October 2003, SATA called to say that they could not hire me as a nurse as my 2nd blood test confirmed that I had leukaemia.  It felt like a bomb had dropped on me.  I was alone, and I broke down and wept uncontrollably.  I was advised to seek treatment immediately, or I could die within three months.  I went through chemotherapy in SGH.  Before the reality of my sickness could sink in, I received a call from my husband telling me of his terminal illness.  At that point, I was emotionally numb.  I withheld my sickness from him as I did not want to burden him.  We talked about reconciling, and he told me that when he felt better after his treatment, he would come over to Singapore to be united with my son and me.  However, three days before Christmas in 2003, I received a call from our family friend to say that my husband had passed away.  I went into depression and even contemplated dying by discontinuing my medication.

Because I had stopped going to the Catholic Church since 1990, I was very far from God.  When I was diagnosed with leukaemia in 2003, I decided to return to Church.  Because my faith was so weak, I also went to other Christian denominations and even to a cult group, looking for God and a cure.  Despite all my efforts, I was unable to find God.  I was in misery, and I asked God where He was.

In 2008, my health deteriorated.  I wanted to reconcile with God for all the wrongs I had done in the past.  I had been attending Sunday Mass like a “zombie”.  God was so merciful to me and He led me to attend Life in the Spirit Seminar at St Bernadette’s Church in July 2009.  For the first time since my diagnosis, I felt a blissful touch in my heart at the LISS.  I could feel God’s love and peace in me.  Two weeks later, an old friend called me to join her at CSC.

It was here at CSC that God enlightened me through the preaching by Fr William Goh; that my cancer was a wake-up call for me to repent from my sinful ways, and to come back to Him.  Since then, I had been faithfully attending the Friday Growth Sessions and the 4th Sat Mass.  Every talk had a message that touched me, especially the topic on Theology of Death.  God had graciously revealed the truth to all that I had been searching for when I was walking through the valley of darkness.  I now desire to sit in the presence of the Blessed Sacrament in the Adoration Chapel.  Jesus also graced me to come to Him in daily Mass with the knowledge that I can draw strength from my communion with Him.  I now have peace and joy in my heart.

I went for my routine check-up in October 2009, and praise God, the doctor cleared me of the leukaemia. I am now in remission.

God has also healed me of my anger and hatred towards my father who has passed away.  I grew up never seeing my dad and mother talk to each other till she died at the young age of 52 years old.  While I was attending the retreat at CSC recently, God healed me of my hurts and graced me to forgive and reconcile with my father during the guided meditation.

God has been so merciful and compassionate towards me.  He has blessed my son and me with a new flat in Sengkang!  He has healed me of my brokenness and unforgiveness, and restored me to good health!    I praise and thank you, Lord!